Since the dawn of time, man has dreamed of traveling at the speed of light... Or at least since, like, 100 years ago and stuff.
I think it can be done.
Somebody told me recently that it was impossible. But Jiminy Cricket said "nothing's impossible", and he's got issues with lying, so I don't think he'd lie about that.
Now, here's the scoop: Attempting to get the body to travel the speed of light through any traditional/cartoonish means (super-slingshot, rocket, sitting by your mama's bum) would not be the way to go. To use an overused phrase, we must think outside the box.
We must solidify light.
If we solidified light, we could use it as our propulsion system. Simply place ourselves in it's path, and ZOOM!! It's a go.
Now, I realize the human body probably cannot withstand the breakneck, breakspine, and liquefy-eyes-speed of light. Therefore, we must invent a Human Turtle Shell, Or Hurtleshell, as I'm calling the prototype. And we'll need some goggles.
Also, we'll need some sort of vehicle to sit in on our magical journey. I'm thinking a hollowed-out shell of a DeLorean would do. It's wedge-shaped enough, and makes a cheeky reference to a certain awesome trilogy...
We would have to strengthen the DeLorean slightly with some sort of something... I don't know yet. But that's the fun of flying by the seat of your pants... Uh, I mean, seat of your modified DMC-mobile.
Now, the real question to all this creativity is way back at the beginning: How do we solidify light? I'll take suggestions, but I'm thinking liquid acrylic would do. Surely, pouring a gigantic bucket of liquid acrylic in front of a 1,000,000 watt lightbulb might have some effect, perhaps solidifying and stretching the liquid and turning it into resin as it zips across the prairies.
Okay, so technically, that wouldn't be solidifying light. Sue me.
At least I've got a plan.
Song of the Day (week): "We Don't Care" by Dan Bryk. I am really a big fan of this dude. And he put a little comment on me ol' myspace last week. Shut up. It might actually be him. Or at least I can fantasize that it was... Give it a listen: www.myspace.com/ladylovinlynx
Link of the Day: http://www.delorean.com/ Sweet.
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As speed increases, so does mass. And herein lies, in my opinion the greatest stumbling block in achieving the speed of light.
If something was being propelled at the speed of light its mass would be infinite, thus making it impossible (or seemingly so)
However, the solution will be found in Jean Claude Van-Dammes legs (the only known objects to have travelled the speed of light) Thus, in 200 years when Jean Claude Van Damme trades in his mortal shell, and uprgrades to a newer and shinier one, and then we can anylise the mollecular make-up of his flesh.
And then and only then will we be able to determine how to travel the speed of light.
God bless you b movie martial arts movie star...god bless you!
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